Stock Market Surfers Gifts

Sales at the Yo-Yo Co.

'This is where the company started handing out sick bags!'

'Daddy is going off to stimulate the economy by making gobs of money.'

'Our highly adventurous 'New Technology' fund is managed by an app.'

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

"I keep feeling we should float the company"

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

Will work for ETFs

'Gentlemen, we need a slogan!'

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

"I had that nightmare again where everyone found out I'm in my late thirties and still have no idea how the stock market works."

'Call the boss! We're in trouble!'

A child runs an equity stand.

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

'The reason I like this guy's stock picks is, he's not burdened by having any experience in finance whatsoever.'

'City Traders - The Complete Menagerie'

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

"Cheer up, if this carries on we could become a very attractive takeover target.

Dow Jones drop

'Better brace yourself. It looks as though your broker's now equipping your monthly statement with crumple zones.'

Economy Slows: 'It's still too fast for me.'

Bookstore. The Stock Market for Dummies. It's either an instructional guide or a history of recent economics.

Smiling businessman with rising profits

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

Jumping Wall Street.

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

...I wonder who started the rumour of your resignation?

"We're always excited to hear from analysts who are bullish on the market."

'I've never seen a stock crash so hard.'