Stock Market Savvy Gifts

'Is this a bad time to ask about my investments?'

The market must be up

Man about man: 'John here sells mutual funds and worry beads.'

Red Letter Days - Payment of Dividends

Man leaving 'Wall St, closed-end mutual funds' building with hand full of money.

"I'm Bobby. If you like the lemonade, perhaps you'd like to invest in the 'Jimmy's Lemonade' franchise, listed in NASDAQ..."

'Dear Shareholder...'

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

'Treat people like people? Let's not get desperate!'

'You're being fined court costs plus what the judge figures he might have made day trading.'

'Today the word on the street was 'Beam me up Scotty'.'

I'm afraid your portfolio of shares looks like an accident waiting to happen.

'FTSE's down again...'

"The stock market is thriving, our bonuses are rising...everything's a-ok. I hear rumors that things aren't good out there...even called a great recession.'"

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"Gentlemen, we're missing a great opportunity by not hitching this company to the current tailspin."

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"The economy always seems to be recovering, but it never recovers."

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

Will work for ETFs

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

'Gentlemen, we need a slogan!'

'You know the economy's in trouble when the Forbes 400 list of wealthiest Americans only has 350 names on it.'

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

A child runs an equity stand.

'The reason I like this guy's stock picks is, he's not burdened by having any experience in finance whatsoever.'

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

"For details on the bear market, here's a bear..."

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'