Sticky Situation Dodger Gifts

'Thought Bubble Gum: 'Oh no! ... I'm going to get words all over my face!''

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

Self-Help Books Families for Lockdown

Examinations.

"When you hear me begin talking about our lousy sales figures, you guys create a distraction."

"Let's just say my teacher and I agreed to disagree."

'Now,they're going to teach you to talk, but remember, after you learn how.stay away from religion or politics.'

"I can help you get your finances back in shape – you've just got to believe in me."

"Son, I’d say the ACL tear is the least of your problems."

"Truth, whole truth, nothing but the truth? I'm not ready for that much of a commitment."

'Another hike in college tuition! The costs are already killing my folks!'

Gone for Broke College

"Arithmetic doesn't agree with me."

Bureaucracy (Murphy's law)

'Dad said that experience is the best teacher, so I cut school and went to the video arcade.'

"My doctor told me to avoid any unecessary stress, so I didn't open his bill."

"Whoever guesses which cup the college tuition is under, gets it."

"This case poses a very difficult choice... I know, coin toss!"

Desk plaque: 'Seize the nap.'

'We should try harder to behave. We're wearing a rut in this floor.'

'There's going to be a lot of blame thrown around. Remember to bob and weave.'

"If you don't want to know the result of the united game then look away now"

"If you don't wish to hear the match result look away now."

'He escaped!'

Money falling down a black hole

'Does the Fifth Amendment apply to report cards?'

Inner Sara Skips Out As Zoom Kicks In

"My teacher wants to talk to you? Wow. What did you do wrong?"

"Of course I don't want you to retire, boss! I'd probably get your job!"

"I never dreamed the substantial early withdrawal penalty was the fund itself."

'Pemberly, I'd like to tweak you ignorance.'

'I'' be in the basement, Amy... below the radar.'

"Here's the sick squid I owe you. . ."