Steel Wool Realist Gifts

Where steel wool comes from.

"Yes, we have a retirement plan. It's called a layoff."

"We end our Newscast with a happy story tonight."

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

'I so wish we had found the shears in the shipwreck...'

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

Virgin wool - 'Clippers On a first date What kind of ewe do you think I am'

'Sure, have some wool to keep your eggs nice and warm...'

Genetic Manipulation

"Whoa. Jeff. You snagged your sweater."

'Thanks girls: Boy it's cold today!'

Academia in Winter

The wool club for mammoths.

Sheep with its wool unwinding because it's snagged on a tree

"My new year's resolution. . . .Not to drink out of the toilet."

Shear Love.

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

"Wow, you're right, Alpaca Wool is very nice against the skin..."

"We quickly realized it was fruitless trying to compete, so now we work together and sell blended wool..."

Wooly mammoth

Dear Diary...Resolutions

Sheep has it's fur shorn into a tutu.

"Brrr! Lucky you, growing your own blanket!"

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

'I can't read my New Year's resolutions -- I must have spilled beer on them last night.'

Sheep Knitting.

"My primary challenge is to strip away the hardened carapace of societal expectations..."

Who am I kidding?

'The wool is virgin - it's none of your damn business about the sheep!'