Steak Lover Gifts

"I just sold the last T-bone, so this may take a while"

At the Steak Restaurant

'I'm sorry, sir, well done isn't an option - we close in twenty minutes.'

"Let that be a lesson to you. Never order a steak in a seafood restaurant."

Artist depicts cow as large steak.

'I thought this was a steak house. Why is the decor for this restaurant pieces of cars and trucks?'

'You're kidding! Is that really what a porterhouse steak is?'

'Of course the steak's TOUGH-yer won't get cissy nosh in 'ere,chum!'

A Bull is getting a Tattoo of a Butcher's Beef cutting chart.

'Phillipe was a great chef - and requested to be cremated medium-rare.'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Man painting a cow

"It's a little well done. I'll have to get my chainsaw."

Stephen Harper: Only for you my love.

"So, that dude eating the huge steak in the SUV hanging from the plane is your dad?!"

'Do you want your zebra de la margola rare, medium or well done?'

The Atkins Diet.

"The Friesian/Kardashian, the best rump steak on the planet!"

A group admires a painting of a steak

'We saw the first robin...he saw the first London broil.'

"How do you like your steak, sir?"

"The abattoir hasn't any butchers so you'll have to help yourself a bit more than usual."

"Mother, is there life after sirloin?"

"I grew up in a very rough neighbourhood, but I've never met anyone as tough as this steak!"

'It's wha-at all we cool guys wear - steak sauce.'

Butcher.

'How would you like your steak?' 'Big.'

'If you're worried what to say you do for a living at your reunion, just tell them you recently bought a large stake in a local winery.'

"Honey, I just got 't-boned' off I-80 West of Omaha!"

"Bad news - aged steak means they get the steak, and then let it age, not that they let us age, and then get the steak."

"That reminds me - I could murder a steak!"

"Just how rare is this steak..."

'OK, sir, sorry that meat was too rare for you. It should be fine now.'

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"It's your t-bone. We'll have to remove it."