Steak Enthusiasts Gifts

'The beef has been genetically modified to taste like a more expensive cut.'

'The Big Beg Theory'

'Life is like a cheap steak...it's tough.'

Honey are you in the mood to fleece a cow tonight

'My doc suggested that I eat more veggies. Can you tell me where I can find the steaks - broccoli flavour?'

Butchers Eye Test

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

'Do you want your zebra de la margola rare, medium or well done?'

What's your thumb doing on my steak? Want me to drop it again?

"How would you like your steak sir—really well done or raw? We've got a new chef."

"And how would you like your steak?"

The Best Little Steak House in the City.

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

'Doctor please come quick! His fever has gone from medium rare to well done!'

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

'There was sizzle but no steak.'

'We saw the first robin...he saw the first London broil.'

"Some protein with my salad? Sure, put a 24 ounce Ribeye in it."

Elevator buttons : Rare, Medium, Well done.

Artist depicts cow as large steak.

'I asked for a rare steak and you certainly don't see many as BAD as this!'

Cow Gag Gifts

'OK, sir, sorry that meat was too rare for you. It should be fine now.'

'If you're worried what to say you do for a living at your reunion, just tell them you recently bought a large stake in a local brewery.'

French suppers.

"Veal or non-veal?"

'The chef says sorry but he doesn't do rare.'

'I always buy him the toughest, chewiest steak. It shuts him right up for half an hour.'

"One medium rare and one with honey."

"Just how rare is this steak..."

"No, I'm not calling for order in the court. I'm tenderizing a porterhouse steak. Do continue, counselor."