Startup Survivor Gifts

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

"Yes, that's our bathroom. We're a startup, so plumbing and running water is a luxury."

Well you know what they say - here today gone tomorrow - or in the case of dotcoms, here today gone shortly after lunch.

"Hello, Miss Brophy? How are my dot.com shares doing at the moment?"

"The cat walking business didn't go anywhere! Neither did we."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

Three gates of hell: marriage counseling, investments, company meetings

'I like the way you handle responsibility, McWit, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"We're a very small international conglomerate."

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

"Bill's a little upset. The boss just chewed him out."

In and Out Tray

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

"My career's in shreds, but on the bright side, so are my files."

Stressed employee says to colleague: 'I think I'm on top of the situation and I hope I'm in the loop, but I can't seem to get ahead of the curve.'

'Don't bother cleaning out your desk. We'll be hiring you back as a consultant for half the salary and no benefits.'

The Buck Never Stops.

'This is Harris, he's been with the firm some 45 years!'

"Not much. Just enjoying my post-lunch bounce."

Between Offices

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

'Our company has hit an iceberg and is sinking fast. Of course, it's all very symbolic.'

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

"Thank God! Someone to network with!"

Cartoon about having many investors for crowd funding.

'Mr. McCoy has been expecting you. If you'll have a seat, he should be with you within the next 6 hours.'

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"This is bad work, Edwards! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!"

"When I got laid off, the corporation enlisted me in the army."