Stars And Stripes Aficionado Gifts

'I'm patriotic, but nobody beats Fido at wagging the flag!'

Fly Football

Assault 'n' Vinegar

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"The boss is charging. I knew you shouldn't have worn that red tie."

Diego Velasquez

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

"Larry, nooo! Don't look into the BOWL!!!"

"It says here that in your last job you did a lot of traveling."

'What happened to your hand.'

'You don't want the job, do you?'

"I'll throw in a few extra pinstripes."

"You've got night fever."

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

"Hey! These are still good!!"

Mark Twain

I see he's still "working" from home.

"Well thank you, and may I say you look quite handsome too..."

"Just when I think things couldn’t get any worse, they replace The Lockhorns with Doonesbury!"

'Johnny, personal feelings like loud neckties and long jokes; best left at home.'

"What are they complaining about?... The local content is the audience...

'My power ties are demanding more closet space.'

"I hope I live long enough to see Bush's view of his legacy come true! I'll be around a long, long, long time!"

Friendly Tie

"I've hired a new nit-picker: he's been great so far!"

A stripe of stockbrokers

"Hey! Where'd the Angel Fish come from!?"

"Julie...would you cancel my 4 o'clock please...?"