Squeaky Toy Enthusiast T-Shirts

He squeaks when you chew him. Then he gets quiet … Too quiet.

"...and this is Sheila. She's my main squeeze."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

Director/Action Man toy.

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"That'll be five bucks."

The Rubber Ball Company

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

Rocking Horse

"Werewolves of London..."

"Bleeeee! It's plastic."

Toy plane with pilot eject.

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"Where the hell's my Slinky?"

"It's his emotional support animal."

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

Teddy and friends.

"If we play house, Timmy, we can't live with my parents because..."

"Relax, Ferguson, I'll have it with you by end of play."

One!

Childlike love

"Of course I'm bored - my batteries are flat!"

What can I play?

Jack in the box on strike.

Typical bored kid of the New Millennium

Toys

Remote Control Duck

Inaction Figure

"Guess who figured how to call 911!"

'...and, of course you get a company car.'

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"

Help me!