Squeaky Toy Aficionado T-Shirts

"It's not so much the chewing that offends me, it's the mocking of our voices."

'My ringtone is a real attention getter. It sounds like a squeaky toy.'

"Sorry, but the will clearly stipulates that Rex gets the vintage squeaky-toy collection..."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

Director/Action Man toy.

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

The Rubber Ball Company

"Bleeeee! It's plastic."

"Werewolves of London..."

Toy plane with pilot eject.

Toy Shops and Educated Children

"It's his emotional support animal."

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

Childlike love

"Of course I'm bored - my batteries are flat!"

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

Teddy and friends.

"If we play house, Timmy, we can't live with my parents because..."

Jack in the box on strike.

What can I play?

Help me!

'...and, of course you get a company car.'

Inaction Figure

Remote Control Duck

Typical bored kid of the New Millennium

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"

Toys

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

'I can change! I swear!'

Girl to girl: 'A friend is someone you don't have to call dibs with.'

'AQ popgun? I want a field model Browning pump chambered for the 3-inch magnum load.'