Squat Squad Gifts

Library: The Weight lifting Section.

"Sorry dear! I'm very busy right now."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

"Try thinking about something else."

Dogs

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

Men playing water football in barrels on a lake

'You failed your Latin exam! But Sweety, it's important to learn Latin: All your friends' names have Latin roots...'

The hostage rescue team

'Hamster Swat Team.'

'Another day another dollar Maurice, but boy do I hate kids!'

"Oh darn, there it is right there: side effects may include squid head."

"The DNA does not lie Mrs Miggins...or should I call you Don Escobar Bolivian drugs czar?"

Hospital: Accident and Emergency and On Purpose and Suffering Nicely.

Dog bath

The disgruntled employees were brought down with tranquilizer darts, ending the worst pillow fight in recent memory.

'Roger that...I'm taking the first clean shot I can get.'

Atlas remembers leg day

"The secret to my success is my ability to always land on my feet."

SWAT Police Chase

"He nibbled though the rotten skirting and then got squashed by my porn mags."

'GIT!!!'

Dancing with death.

SWAT The Press

"Someday I want to join the swat team."

"I think we both know it's time for the groomer."

"Actually it's in his profile - he used to knock on doors and run away."

"They're refusing to throw down their knives until after they finish dinner."

Remedial SWAT team training.

"I'll have what everyone else is having."

'Your scooter is cool, man!'

'Okay, where's your chair?' - 'I've decided to squat for 8 hours a day to build my thighs.' - 'Won't that hurt?' - 'Fortunately, I've developed a massive pain tolerance by sitting opposite you for so long.'

'You wouldn't be very good at petting Dachshunds.'

"Oh honey, what a romantic anniversary pres..."

"I remember when I patrolled this street alone, with just my night sticks."