Spotlight Dodger Gifts

Bob worked hard to avoid the spotlight.

"How do I turn off my camera so no one stares?"

"It's been moved that we adjourn for an afternoon nap. Is there a second?"

"Bill's a little upset. The boss just chewed him out."

"Summarise all that's been said. I wasn't listening."

"I can hardly wait...TWO WHOLE weeks without having to deal with mindless e-mails, incessant interruptions, boring meetings...."

"Hope you weren't planning on leaving early."

Fear of news.

A breakthrough in the morning meeting

"We missed the meeting, but there might be a couple of the little muffins left."

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

Private Viewing

Open Mike for the spotlight operators

While you were out...

"Any yet he's always on my case."

Tell me the truth. Do you think my signature is logo-esque?

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

Man trying to catch a saxophonist with butterfly wings.

Jenkins won't be here today. He just called in healthy.

'Isn't it time you got over your silly fear of water?'

'Don't read the Book of Revelations yet -- it's full of spoilers.'

'9K a year!? It's an outrage! At my level of attendance that's 3K per lecture!'

"Baldo, I appreciate your hard work...and your eagerness to complete your chores quickly. But next time...don't blow the leaves while I'm painting."

"If only you could do this in real life..."

Bureaucracy (Murphy's law)

"I've had custom reading glasses made that blot out the words 'brexit' and 'royal.'"

"Can you send me a text so I can use it as a ruse to get out of this conversation?"

'We see a lot of carpal tunnel syndrome caused by repetitious pushing of the tv mute button during the political ad season.'

"You should have been here at eight!"

Catching the Sun

'Ms Ferguson, weasel me out of the 315 meeting.'

'I'm sorry, he's in a meeting. would you like his voice mail?'

"You say you have a medical malpractice case?"

"Myra's our creative director. She fabricates emergency situations for me when client meetings go on too long."

Cowboy posting notices saying WANTED...FOR FLYPOSTING