Sports Training Buff Gifts

'No, Jerome, that is incorrect... can anyone else demonstrate the proper way to tape a basketball player's ankle?'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

Golfing Boss

Bowled over again!

Muscles

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

Football

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'Does sports trivia count as something I learned today?'

'We're looking for athletic people.'

"I told him he should have trained more."

'Fergie quits - chewing gum sales hit all time low!'

Vendor selling testosterone.

Keep Fit.

"This round, forget the finesse. Hit him."

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

"How long were you in that headstand?"

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

'You know our track team stinks when our star pole vaulter is better at the limbo.'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

'It's caused by doing too many wrist curls, overindulging in spinach and... Excuse me. Everyone in here - stat - if you want to see an actual case of 'Popeye Syndrome'!'

'Get him in a full nelson, you dolt! You'll never pin him with a Heimlich maneuver!'

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

'...and if you guys keep screwing up, I'm gonna have to start kicking some butt!'

"How much could your mother bench?"

'Will that be coach?'

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

"Dear, there's someone here to collect your soul."

"We supply the exercise and nutrition program, but it's up to you to supply the narcissism."