Sports Teacher Gifts

'Sorry, you're not sadistic enough to be a P.E. teacher!'

'He hates basketball! He hates basketball! He hates basketball!'

'Your fitness regime hasn't worked headmaster. The gym floor collapsed.'

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

Umpire School Taking A Ball Four.

Basketball

"What do you think you're doing, Felton...propping up the dang building?"

"The coach said that you play like Ronaldo? Ha! You loser! He told me I play like Chloe Kelly!"

Whistle

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

Go team!

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

"I AM at my usual position."

"We first met on the net. We began to court, but between my foul mouth and Wilson being on the rebound...let's just say it was a long shot, but he pressed, and I was defenseless. Now, we're as 'hoopy' as can be."

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

Punt Cake

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

'What goes up, must come down!' 'Not if you give it enough thrust, to send it flying forever across the face of the universe.'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

Snooker Golf.

Even good cholesterol can develop an unhealthy sports addiction...

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

Saving a Heart

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

I think this interleague play is getting out of hand.

'Gee, you beat Roger again!'