Sports Talk Aficionado Gifts

'Must this family always talk sports at the dinner table?'

"Portrait of a Lady"

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

'When I'm not thinking about me, the Giants, the Knicks or the Yankees, I'm thinking about us.'

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

'You haven't heard the best thing. . .no referees.'

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

Day two of our series: America's sleeping pill addiction. My guest, pillhead Rudy Park. I'm not a pillhead. Come clean. Admit the obvious truth. What truth? Rush Limbaugh made you do it! A political pundit never misses an opportunity. You got hooked only after O'Reilly harassed you.

Cristiano Ronaldo

Joey Barton's red card wins Premiership League for Manchester City.

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

'He's missed six goals today. I bet he could kick himself.'

The Harper Plays Cricket.

"I wanted a partner... I got a co-host."

"Why so aloof in here? When you're on base, you yak your ass off with every Yankee in sight."

'What TV show do frog princes go on ...?...'

The Boys of Indian Summer

Fox hunting.

Football.

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

Night Life: L.A.

"Yes, it's a sports related injury. He dropped his bowling ball."

Punishment for the kicker.

Football heads...

'It took some doing, but we got your name on!'

Thibaut Nicolas Marc Courtois

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

"I need to buy a faster fastball."

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'