Sports Professional Gifts

"Mr. October"

"Yeah, actually, we did need you to come in today."

Cup winners more happy about the money

'I hate it when someone paid less than I am strikes out.'

'Listen up! Here's the starting lineup. Sheedy, second base. Taylor, right field. Jackson, role model...'

'There goes Finley...turning pro.'

''Struts' Lebow, batting 0347 recieves $4,200 grant in hitting to supplement his $1,630,000 salary.'

Manny Pacquiao

"...And I don't want any resentments just because someone hits below the belt..."

The Best rugby World Cup Winners

Kei Nishikori

MLB Owners, Players, Fans

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

If nobody had invented graphics

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

Football Chameleon

Monica Seles

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

A married couple share the same pole vault.

A day at the transgenic races

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'