Sports Marketing Enthusiast Gifts

'You're still on the same football team, Zbradowski, but you've been traded to a different beer company.'

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

The MBA Draft

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

If nobody had invented graphics

Football Chameleon

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

Monica Seles

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

Saving a Heart

A day at the transgenic races

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

Raheem Sterling

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

Ratminton

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

A married couple share the same pole vault.

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

"How should we divide the teams?"

Gary turns 40.