Sports Improviser Gifts

Castaway with a tennis court.

Jazz is Invented

'OK, so I fumbled. Now can you cure it or not?'

'I'm re-enacting a battle with my conscience.'

'I made a Valentine's Day card for you. The school has no art supplies so I wrote the color in.'

"When you tell your Father how you're dropping out of college to be a renaissance faire entertainer, the least you could do is break character."

'We have an emergency, ladies and gentlemen! We need help - can anybody in the audience play the tambourine.'

The Augie Twins write music strictly for their own amusement.

'I'm a loaf of bread.'

Dexter Miller developed the talking golf ball to call out when lost in the rough, but... (golf ball in pain)

"And I'm telling YOU it looks exactly like the picture. See?"

"The line in the script was actually 'Woof woof,' but, when we started shooting, 'Bow wow' came out, and the rest is history."

His Other Shtick

"That's not a mistake, that's jazz."

Crossing the thin line into show business

'Sometimes if things blow onto the canvas I just leave em there.'

Jacques Loussier.

Piano desk.

"You're a fool, Carl - a fool and an idiot."

Inflate a job!

"We could hire another accountant and secretary, but wouldn't it be fun to have a barista?"

'The problem isn't your high definition television, it's your low definition eyes.'

'We plan to introduce bodychecking and fistfights to the game.'

Zoom Backdrop

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

'I couldn't find real fruit for your still life painting, so we'll just use these fruit roll-ups.'

'Go and tell the man with the Eric Dolphy CD down his trousers that's not what we mean by free jazz.'

'I know we've got to save money, dear, but can't you use the phone like other people?'

'What gets me is how the actors make themselves so small!'

"I know the organ is broken, but I was kind of hoping you knew how to play the guitar."

'Your account is overdue so the doctor is sending you to a specialist...our collection agency.'

'Don't mind me. They're having problems finding me desk space on level 4.'

'I thought it might help our budget if I rented them our backyard.'