Sports Gossip Enthusiast Gifts

'... And now, the sports gossip.'

No Baseball

'Almost anyone can learn to play golf, and you're the 'almost'.'

'...and watch out for his 'flipper'!'

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

Football heads...

Punishment for the kicker.

Team medic spraying deodorant

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

'The manager takes the pitcher out of the game'

"If PBS announcers did football games." "Let's listen carefully to the quarterback as he scans his options. It appears that the defense seems to want to deter his team from moving the ball forward..." "The fans are making so much noise. I wonder if they know how hard that makes it for the players to concentrate?"

"A game similar to baseball was first played in the Olympics in 1996." I didn't think "Jeapardy!" had any softball questions.

The Washington Arbitrators

'To protect their investments, many baseball owners are hiring bodyguards for their players.'

'I'm taking you off of chattering in the outfield.'

'Oh great, who do you think's gonna have to clean that up.'

'He still can't manage to get into the box.'

"I thought they decided who was the best team last year?"

Football Boomerang.

"We must prepare for the threat of China laying claim to Raducanu."

Tour de France champ Octave Lapize

"We're playing soccer, not football!"

Rugby player searches on line for 'front teeth'.

'He's using a cheat sheet, ump! Can he do that?'

"It looks like the champ has finally me his match!!"

'...You have a morbid fear of the ball.'

'Please cover for me Carol. I'll be away from my desk, roaming the cubicles, searching for sports talk.'

"I'm working on a new way to lose a football game." "Never mind, I'm sure whatever it else, the Browns have already patented it."

The Breakfast of Cheaters

"The coach said that you play like Ronaldo? Ha! You loser! He told me I play like Chloe Kelly!"

Throwing the syringe.

...'So I said forget about the wages, I just want to play football.'

'Our team has gone undefeated since my players started wearing moral Blinders!'