Sporting Event Gifts

Sprint race about to start. One contestant wearing a rocket attached to his back. The fuse is lit ready to help him win the race.

'We ran out of cups.'

Iron Man Contest

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

Go team!

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

Tension filled the tent.

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Raheem Sterling

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'I told him if he didn't get here quick he'd miss out on all the beer and food.'

A man cheers

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

"Carrots just didn't get me going anymore, so I switched to chocolate instead..."

Strive to win!

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

'The English player has hit the net more times than the entire England team in the football World Cup!'

"Why so aloof in here? When you're on base, you yak your ass off with every Yankee in sight."

'Here we go again...'

"Compromise? What the hell is there between safe and out?"

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

Goalkeeper makes the wrong save.

A prehistoric football match.

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

Carlo Ancelotti

Extra Long-jump

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

'Nice Header, Lauren!'

The first 10,000 fans got a concussion bobblehead!

This is great, Ernie, there's a pennant race and the ballpark is packed every day! The food selection here is unmatched anywhere! Today I've already had nachos, a bit of hot dog and some ice cream! Coming here always makes me queasy! Oh, the foods too much for you? No, I just get nervous in a place where the term "sacrifice fly" is used!

'Okay, men, let's go out and win one for the flipper.'

"Are you sure he tested negative?"