Spooky Specialist Gifts

Hi-Tech warning.

Listening Room - Enter at your own risk!

Night of the Latkes

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

Out To Lurch

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

"Had more ghost-hunters 'round my place last night....scared the daylights outta me!"

'Halloween is just around the corner, kids. Have you decided what are you going to wear?'

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

Tim Burton

Get on with it!

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

Classic Emojis for sale.

How was the Halloween party? Who was there? It was fun, except the Zombie didn't talk to anybody. The Grim Reaper was a real killjoy, and the jack-o-lantern made a fool of himself -- by the end of the evening he was smashed. Did the Black Cat or the Ghost attend? I crossed paths with a black cat but I don't know if the Ghost came to the party. All night it felt like he was right there but I never actually saw him!

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's undead."

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

Punkins

Frankenstein's Ancestry

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

Ghost Scare-apy Sessions

"It's not so bad! But I DO have to sleep on my side. . .2

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

Born of the Dead

'Try my health brew...1% fat, no cholesterol, high fiber and low sodium.'

"My Mom says that's what happens if you eat too much Halloween candy."

Stephen King

"Yeah, vertical cemeteries are helping urban sustainability. But going by haunted cemetery standards ... kinda lame."

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

"Trick or treat?"

"I'm getting your dear, departed husband—he can't believe you paid forty-five dollars for this."

Bride of Frankenstein charges her phone