Spooky Skeptic Gifts

Rational explanations

Meet Stephen Krkzk Author of 'Why Conspiracy Theories Are Nonsense'

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

"If there were really a God, trees would come with outlets and wifi hubs."

'If I'd known these programs were going to be so fake - I'd be psychic!'

"Sure, it's Good News, but is it fake news?"

Experts through the ages.

"Dont believe anything those guys have told you. None of it. It's all B.S."

'The cow jumped over the moon? The mouse ran up the clock? Steroids, right?'

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

'You see me coming here every week and paying you fifty dollars...'

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

"Anyway, it turned out that god was a ruddy algorithm after all!"

Holy Roller Church: We accept all denominations, but we are especially fond of $20, $50, $100, & $500...

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

"We’re having privacy concerns with your omniscience."

"If I don't think it's going to work, will it still work?"

'It may look that way... But actually, I'm an atheist

"Nothing is as it seems, my son."

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

"and what are you giving up for lent, Reverend?" "Religion"

'Do I ever wonder about a higher power? No, I wonder what's on TV.'

'How do we know YOU'RE not bearing false witness?'

'This one contains the commandments that will make people ENJOY life! Ha ha, just kidding.'

'He can't speak to the dead, but he can speak to the dead.'

House of Wishful Thinking

Doing Something About the Weather

'Hey, what's with all this 'God forbid' stuff?'

"I think they're beginning to suspect our science is fraudulent."

"Huh! Never a miracle vaccine when you want one - then three come along at the same time - bloody typical!"

Actual Results May Vary

'Is there a doctor in the house we can trust?'

'Our financial statement was delivered 'postage due'. Think that's a sign?'

'So it wasn't b*****t after all.'