Splash Dodger Gifts

'Isn't it time you got over your silly fear of water?'

Bring your own inflatable.

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

Bathing the dog

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

'The country is awfully deep, but the falling is delightfully soft and safe'

Men playing water football in barrels on a lake

Private Viewing

Portrait sweating above a fireplace

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

Tell me the truth. Do you think my signature is logo-esque?

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

Man trying to catch a saxophonist with butterfly wings.

"How do I turn off my camera so no one stares?"

"Baldo, I appreciate your hard work...and your eagerness to complete your chores quickly. But next time...don't blow the leaves while I'm painting."

'Don't read the Book of Revelations yet -- it's full of spoilers.'

'Charity sends her thanks!'

Some people bring sunshine wherever they go.

The dream works when the team works!

'Is it labor day already?'

"Are you listening to me?"

'If you don't stop interrupting me with your phone calls, we're never going to finish our face to face meeting.'

Cowboy posting notices saying WANTED...FOR FLYPOSTING

Children swimming.

'Do you mind? I'm trying to read.'

"You say you have a medical malpractice case?"

Bob worked hard to avoid the spotlight.

"Can I pretend he's yours?"

'Amazing! 140 decibels as he hits the surface! That puts him easily into first!'

'Now I know why they call you Cinderella... You're always running away from the ball.'

"That book was so cliche. Can you believe the butler actually did it?"

Leaking Art

'I started out as a sculptor, but I kept hitting my thumb.'