Spender Extraordinaire Gifts

Excess

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"I need to increase my salary so I can increase my spending."

George doesn't really like me using the credit card.

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

This is Dr. Sadie, what's your question, caller? I just found out my wife got a bonus at work. But instead of buying gifts for my mother and my six brothers, she flew to Maui and sent me a photo of herself eating a seven-course meal. Stop whining. She's given you the best gift a spouse can give ... Something to hold over her head for the rest of your lives. Well ... There is that, I guess.

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

'Man, I've bought heaps on my credit card this month...It always amazes me...How many things I'd rather have than money.'

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

After her laser surgery, Alice was able to read barcodes without an optical scanner.

'Some people say they're ego-compensation, but what do they know.'

I'm so hungry I could eat a horse! You've come to the right place.

"I love holiday shopping, but with all the scams this time of year I must be careful."

"I see you've got a new cheese counter."

Men and Women's changing rooms

Caravan Club shop is selling Hold-Ups.

"There's another one! Pull over!"

'Never thought I'd enjoy a cricket match so much.'

'Spending and consuming - that's my kind of patriotism.'

'Just because I'm a doctor without borders doesn't mean I venture into menus without prices.'

"I got a bonus for the first time in years. Would it be selfish to spend it on myself instead of on Christmas gifts?"

"It's from eBay! I won a cigarette lighter for a 1964 Chevy Impala. I make my dreams come true one bid at a time."

"Hey! Great haircut!!

"You spoil that dog."

Animal Crackers. Free-range animal crackers.

'You wouldn't stimulate the economy, so I did!'

'Before you say anything, I've saved more than you earn in a month!'

Bottom-Feeders

'I think we should put a limit on how much we spend on each other at Christmas, like two hundred and twenty thousand pounds.'

80 Million Euros for a football player.

"I'm still spending a lot of money, but I'm spending it ironically."

'Still glad you sprung for the 84-inch flat panel?'

"If it's any consolation, spending all that money shopping made me feel a lot better."