Speechwriting Admirer Gifts

'Ask not what Obama can do for you....', 'Here we go again.'

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

Inclusive speech

What's normal?

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

Political convention

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

"Just a brief moment, Linda, to thank you for my delicious meals. And if you need me by your side... just whistle." "What fresh hell is this?"

Changing Minds

'I look forward to a bigger and bolder vision in my 2nd term.'

"The boss likes people with strong convictions. You're hired."

"Now that I can talk, here's my speaking fee."

'Look dear, he's writing political speeches.'

We need a Europe of U-turns.

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

"My master's vowel hyperarticulation is wearing a bit thin..."

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

MLK

"I liked the fee-fi-fo-fum part, but I found the rest of his speech racist and repellent."

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

Information...political rhetoric

'I said 'barium,' not 'bury him'!'

Tonight: Town Hall Meeting. With free speech, sometimes I think that you get what you pay for!

'I won't lower myself to the level of my opponent.'

"But I won't bore you with the all too familiar story of a dictator's rise to absolute power,"

'Yes, it's a stupid speech, Senator, but you've got to court the stupid VOTE.'

'Everyone distrusts spin. . . so let's go back to old-fashioned lying.'

'I think I've scored.'

'Mr. President, I have a question, where's the mens' room?'

'Psst, Noah - there's a rumour going round that the dodos are gay.'