Spark Rekindler Gifts

"He used to be romantic. Now I'm trying to restore him to his default settings."

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

'Sigh. . .You work life balance includes me as well you know.'

"You wanted the magic back in our relationship..."

"You never giggle and read cartoon captions to me anymore."

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

'We're conducting a survey to find out how many married couples still have that old feeling.'

'I think it's time we got a new headboard.'

It was worth a try, but I'm afraid the thrill is still gone, Harold.

"Hey, I know - why don't we go on a little crime spree?"

Sadie, we need to see a couple's counselor. Yuck. No way! I won't spend a bunch of dough to have some halfwit tell me how to live my life! But I found an inexpensive counselor who will just listen to us talk through our issues. Counseling $10. This end up.

Still Lives: 'I just need to think of one bright idea and I'll be made for life!'

Woman does a strip tease on a remote control.

"She always gets the upper bunk."

"A see through nighty? God who'd want to see you through that?"

'The plan is to market our original product as a new product...'

'And he seems to think he's God's gift to women.'

"And, of course all our rockets come with a three second warranty."

'We need to twerk.'

'We've created fire! We're Gods!'

"Lately she refers to me as her 'insignificant other'."

'My husband is all work and no play. Do you have anything that smells like an office?'

'Jeez, Hon - ain't you ever goin' wear your 'yes' jammies again!?'

"Okay scouts, that ends today's online soldering session!"

What about the company car you promised?

"First of all, we need to push the beds together."

'Well is good to see that the physical side is still - er, alive and kicking!'

'We haven't fought in years. I'd like a rematch.'

"Your idea of bringing the two of us closer together always seems to be for me to go with you to Bloomingdale's."

'What fresh hell is this? I just spent 50 grand on hair plugs.'

'And what makes you think this classroom wasn't wired properly?'

The pastor forgot to remove his wireless mic before entering the baptismal."

Has a verdict the jury reached? I told you this judge was known for his creative sentencing?