Soy Switcher Gifts

Actually, a lot of my friends have switched to soy.

"States of tofu"

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

Tonight: Wagner's Ring Tone Cycle.

Big Rock University. Guidance Counselor. I'd like to switch my major from hunting to gathering!

'I don't think there's any hope for my golf game.'

'I made them during the blizzard in January. Whad'ya say we go liven up my sister's pool party?'

'Bummer Dude! No waves. Moondoggie punked me!'

Tell me a deposition, mommy.

"I'm now too old to produce milk, and I can't afford to retire as yet, so I've had to diversify..."

"An actor ... huh, that’s funny, because you look just like a waiter."

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

'I understand your world view, but what world are you coming from?'

Now we wait for the snow.

Signs of Fall

'I'd like to change my major from electrical engineering to English or something.'

'... and instead of a brain, the wizard gave the scarecrow a smart phone.'

Scary Slug Stories

"I had to switch to tea, coffee was keeping me up all day."

"Just because I switched political parties at an appropriate time?"

'Let's switch sides. My feet are killing me.'

Vegan Voldemort

Floating Voters

When vegans pose for photos.

Golfer turned Javelin thrower

"We're switching from donuts to bagels effective Tuesday. Johnson, you handle the consumer backlash."

Old Man Winter.

"Being a vegan should be considered an extreme sport."

'Oh great. It's Western and I use an English saddle.'

"There goes another childhood illusion. When I was a kid, he had eight reindeer."

"Shuffle Mode"

Free-range tofu.

Waiter in Waiting Room with Needle

Indian Winter

'Two chicken lip toasties and three salmon leg baguettes...I'm guessing you're a new apprentice.'