Southern Charmer Gifts

Hellbillies.

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

'By golly, I think we've got ourselves a prodigy!'

You're the olive in my martini

"Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're our only hope."

'At least they can't touch the village local' say two country gents. The pub now has a sign on the window saying 'This is now a smoke free pub, also no dogs or horsey types!'

'May I have the key to your heart?'

Little Red Riding Hood in Dallas

The Cattle show Week.

"Welcome to the French Quarter!"

Cool hand... Uke

Hey mum, do you wanna see s'thing disgustin'?

'I never knew there was a common ancestor of man and chicken.'

Wedding Wellies

'I'd say that was just the thing to wear on a visit to an 80-year old uncle in Texas who's going to leave you five million dollars.'

Truman Capote

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

"...and I have a farmhouse in the city."

Chicken singing romantic songs

"Warm and rich, fresh and bright, with depth and intensity. Not the wine, you."

Women rush to man with 'I heart emotions' t-shirt.

'That's all right, dear -- I'll just pick something up on the way to work.'

'Do you have anything that smells like wedding bells?'

Country Mouse and City Mouse Meet Suburb Mouse

Windmill

Cow selling milk from small roadside stand.

'What have I been up to? Oh, a moo-moo here and a moo-moo there.'

"You'll love Alex. He's got a lovely sense of humour."

'Wow, this really is an incredible space ...'

"What do I bring to the company? I'm relentlessly cheerful and able to handle pressure."

'Dang, just another scarecrow.'

The Country Wedding.

"Carmen, how are you today? Wait! Don't tell me! You're as wonderful and as beautiful and charming as ever!"

A Painter Paints A Landscape Observed By Two Locals.

'Miss Wilson, please send in the cow.'