Sound Sharer Pillows

Ear Bud Hijacking

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Two priests share a laugh outside a confessional booth

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"I love that you still call me 'honey'."

"Go ahead, tell him... Your friend is correct. Nuts are fruit. Why won't you ever believe me?"

Wanna talk about it?

'The hard part will be writing the tutorial.'

Girl to girl: 'A friend is someone you don't have to call dibs with.'

"My instagram feed is basically people, dog food, and tennis balls."

'You put it down for five seconds. I get it now.'

"Congratulations! It's a boy! Quickly nurse! Get her phone and upload a picture to facebook!"

"Well...at least you don't s**t on my ideas."

'You know, it isn't the mother's texting while delivering that bothers, it's those damn selfies they upload to Facebook.

"It's my box of secrets. It has things I've thought about but would never tell anyone!"

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

"Now, is this the kind of painting you mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

Lessons.

"First of all, this conversation never happened."

'We're running late and I have much to cover. Can you hold your eight-part question for later?'

"Slow down. This stuff is gold, I’m tellin’ ya! Gold!"

Garden of Earthly Delights

'Normally I don't mind regifting but on occasion you get back the same hideous thing you tried to get rid of.'

Gone Lecturin'

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

'She blogged her first word today.'

"As you can see this is pretty embarrassing so I'd appreciate keeping it between you, me and this fence post."

"Your daughter has 'I have something to share' syndrome."

'Mom calls this a diary where you write private thoughts no one else can see. What fun is that?'

"...and so I left Wall Street and made a killing in poetry."

Couple in bed. Man says: 'Are you BLOGGING this?'

"We'll you're never gonna get it."