Soreness Survivor Gifts

Nervous Oral Testing

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

"Is it just me, or is the pollen particularly bad this year?"

"Roll over. Your Zs are looking like Ns."

'What's the diagnosis?' - '*Cough*' - 'It's not good, I'm afraid.' - 'Tell me. I have to know.' - 'You have man flu, Peel.' - 'Why, God? Why?!!' - 'I'm so sorry.' -

'These pajamas come with a flak jacket sewn into the lining to protect against the 'Stop Snoring' elbow in the ribs.'

Man sneezes and blows flowers out of painting.

'You see, I'm allergic to dog dander....'

A Few Common Ailments

The Meeting: Day Four

'If God had meant us to fly, he would have made airline seats big enough to sit in.'

"He hates his six-monthly visits."

'Something tells me we are NOT on the same page.'

"Well, yeah, Doc, I twisted my back a little...but it was the longest golf shot I've ever made!"

"Folsom's seasick, sir."

"Our marriage will last a whole lot longer if you move and breathe minimally."

'I said he could sleep with me... well... he's asleep.'

"Get me this! Get me that! Get me..."

'Now she's frightened of your snoring...'

Asthma cats

'Don't be frightened, he's only been 'n' gone 'n' done his back in again.'

'Bless you!'

Guy hanging in dungeon to other: 'Are you sure this chiropractor is licensed?'

"Lately, when I wake up, I'm stiff as a board!"

Pollen's Side of the Story

'You decided not to join the navy because you get seasick?'

"No, thanks, Tex - it makes me queasy just watching you."

"Next time, try warming up with a little idle speculation before jumping to a conclusion."

'Hey! Suddenly, my back feels way better! Weird...'

"You're lucky, me, I can't read when travelling: I get motion sickness..."