Pain Survivor Gifts

"With 1 being the lowest, and 10 being the highest, could you rate the pain of your headache?"

Gary turns 40.

Lumbar support animal

Piano and Pianist with broken legs.

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

Gym. Weight Room. This must be sculpting my body --- All my muscles feel like putty.

'I just invented the 'chair' - It relieves lower back pain!'

'It's a beautiful lighthouse. However, hauling the batteries up the stairs has taken its toll on my back.'

'Take two asprin and stick your head in the the sand.'

"I see you do all your own stunts."

'What's the diagnosis?' - '*Cough*' - 'It's not good, I'm afraid.' - 'Tell me. I have to know.' - 'You have man flu, Peel.' - 'Why, God? Why?!!' - 'I'm so sorry.' -

Sporting maladies.

"Well, the first thing we're going to do is loosen those suspenders!"

'I've got an appointment with Mr. Payne.' - 'He'll see you now.' - 'Okay, take a deep br-' - 'Gah!' - 'Great, now turn ov-' - 'Argh!' - 'And a final tw-' - 'Mummy!' - '*Sob*' - 'Okay, all done.' - 'Did you, by any chance...' - '...hear you crying...'

'You've got a broken finger.'

"Can i get a transfer from the porcupine enclosure..?

"I don't get it. I only had a couple of beers in the pub last night, but I've got a splitting headache this morning."

'Bloody plaster of Paris.'

"I don't prescribe opioids, but feel free to grab a CBD-laced lollipop on your way out."

"Too hard?"

"Well, yeah, Doc, I twisted my back a little...but it was the longest golf shot I've ever made!"

"Of course, I would suggest a shot of novacaine."

'It's an old baseball injury.'

'Exactly which school of acupuncture are you from?'

'I'll soon have you in stitches but it's no laughing matter.'

Gym. Weight Room. This must be sculpting my body --- All my muscles feel like putty. (Published previously on September 4, 2010).

"You owe your life to that dog. He pulled you to safety. Unfortunately, there's still no sign of the dog ??" or your arm."

'I'll be able to play the piano in 2 days? Well I couldn't before the accident!'

'I have stomach cramps.' - 'Oh.' - 'It feels like a cat raking its claws down the inside of my stomach.' - 'Oh.' - 'Raking in a good way or a bad way?' -

'Don't be frightened, he's only been 'n' gone 'n' done his back in again.'

'This is going to be a level three.'

Guy hanging in dungeon to other: 'Are you sure this chiropractor is licensed?'

"Lately, when I wake up, I'm stiff as a board!"

'Oh, thank god, a hot tub... My back is literally killing me.'

First Shot Discus Thrower