Solitary Party Goer Gifts

'When you work from home, the office parties are rubbish.'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

"I am so attracted to you right now."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

'Sorry, miss. It seems to be stuck!'

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

Masquerade

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

Redhead

Carioca

'One more hangover like this and I'm going to have to claim for sickness during holiday absence.'

'Having algorithm and having rhythm are 2 different things.'

Cheers

Blue Haired Lady in Ballgown

Christmas sweater alternatives

Guy dressed as an ostrich at a fancy dress party. Lump in birds throat like a real bird.

Leo McKern

Healthcare workers come to the N.H.S. Fancy dress party dressed as viruses.

Space hopper as a bouncer of a nightclub

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

"How much longer, roughly, will you be introducing me as a 'disgruntled Republican'?"

"My compliments to the sommelier."

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

"I'm terrible with names, but never fail at fingerprint, facial or voice recognition."

The Friday Night Olive Races Down at the Tribeca Martini Bar

"...and what do you think will happen if you do attend the party?

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

'At that moment, across a crowded room, their thighs met.'

"My wife and I handle our own finances. I'm an accountant and she's a grief counselor."

Down on Bourbon Street...

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

"Aperitif?"

"I'm learning to let go and have fun."