Party Goer Gifts

"Nobody move! I think I lost an eye."

"I had hoped the extroverts would talk to the introverts, but they're just talking to each other."

Healthcare workers come to the N.H.S. Fancy dress party dressed as viruses.

"Actually, I don't consider myself to be a have or a have-not. I'm more of a have-to-have."

"Nice to put a face with a call."

'I think, therefore I am.' 'I don't, therefore I am not.'

"Funny. I never thought of you as having legs."

"You're a lesbian, how nice, I'm a pisces"

Confucius say: shut up.

Latin Jazz fusion

'See, Robbie, I told you this party would be fun. Everyone's insisting we stay for dinner.'

'Having algorithm and having rhythm are 2 different things.'

"What did you say your super power was again?"

A guest at a dinner party requesting some champagne

'Oh! For goodness sake, stop celebrating Britishness...'

'Yes I suppose it is a bit more fiddly than a crooklock...'

'Whoa, don't ask me any math questions -- I'm a SOCIAL engineer!'

God save the Queen.

Man in 19th century garb at a Seventies Night: 'But it doesn't say NINETEEN seventies.'

A young man being introduced to an intellectual at a party

'I'd like you to meet my hilarious sidekick.'

'Well, Roger, it looks as if you're finally going to meet a few of my ex-husbands!'

'I don't know if you remember me, Audrey, but my name is Axel, and we met at a party last week....What do I look like? Well, I have a prominent nose and I'm on the short side...I'm also a wolverine.'

'This is Jan. My better half.' 'Really, Tom... More like two-thirds.'

"Are you pleased to see me or is that a vuvuzela down your trousers?"

"I want you to meet Dave. You'll get a kick out of his money."

'Brian's a professor of stating the bleeding obvious.'

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

'Norman Whimplebottom, but you can call me Tiger.'

"Of course, that was long ago, but at the time it seemed like the present."

'Oh no, we're wearing the same dress!'

"It's not a cummerbund. It's my underpants."

How California Republicans Can Still Win Campaigns

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

"Wait, aren't you that bloke off the telly?"