Solar Panel Sage Gifts

"The good news is, the wind turbine is working great, the bad news is, it blew all the solar panels off the roof."

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

Politically Correct Snowperson

Academics At The Beach: The Old Man And The Sea

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

"For the last time, I’m not Bigfoot — I’m Larry from Vermont!"

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

"If obsessing about trash is wrong, then. . . I don't wanna be right."

The Authentic Christmas.

It's the biofuel generation.

"Say one Our Father Attenborough and three Hail Gretas."

Climate Summit

"Someday, son, all this will be yours. It'll be under water, but still ..."

The oil trap.

Energy Conservation Be Damned. Fred constantly prepared for Global Warming and Nuclear Winter to happen at the same time.

"Please help us reduce our garbage and improve our energy efficiency and our water quality. Help us to be eco-wise and-above all-to empower others."

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

WORLD COUNCIL ON GLOBAL WARMING, 'I regret to report that there's no global warming threat after all - we just got Fahrenheit and Celsius mixed up.'

Climate Change Rhetoric

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

Soon The Moon Will Have Cellphone Reception Better Than That One Part Of Your Commute

The chip - Loyal worker, tireless teacher, friend

Climate Change Denier's Playbook

"But deep down you must have wanted to change."

'It's no use Lieutenant - he's still refusing to separate his recyclables.'

"So did you have to wear a mask when you were sunbathing?"

"How much energy did you use to create me? I wasn't awakened with nuclear power, was I?..."

'That's not whitewash....that's detergent!'

This salad tastes funky� Is this ranch dressing? Oh, I'm sorry, sir� I thought you ordered raunch dressing.

'Was this eye of newt locally sourced?'

Peak oil and the limited future of petrol cars.