Software Architect Gifts

"After a long day at the office writing business software...Bob loves to relax writing game software."

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

The Computer Bore

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

"Quick, Lassie, go get I.T.!"

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

"You realize there’s probably an app for all this?!"

I'm Bored With Educational Toys

"I know other hospitals are worried about the superbug, but ours is the only one that understands the accounts system."

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

'A computer is only as good as the people who are employed to replace the people who were made redundant by the computer.'

Artifishial Intelligence

"He loves his computer but it's a love that's not returned."

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

Tossing computer into canyon.

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

Where was I?

"We need to update your entire operating system."

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"