Soft-hearted Jurist Gifts

'And after I've tucked you in, I'll read you a nice bedtime story.'

Prejudice/Empathy

"I know. I miss him, too."

"Let's take in a trial."

Church Parking Space Reserved For Sinner Of The Week

'I hear he has a reputation as a loose Canon.'

'He'll be really p****d if he doesn't get nominated for an award this year.'

'Disqualified!... He did not yell 'Boing' when he jumped!'

'I'll show you my fine print, if you show me yours.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

"What can you possibly expect from my client, your honor? He's a wolf!"

'...And zap him quick, before that bleeding-heart Governor gets back from vacation.'

'I'm afraid, Reverend, that what the large print giveth, the small print taketh away.'

"You want the truth, the whole truth, or nothing but the truth?"

'Hey! Kid in the blue! Where'd you get that BEER?'

Computer questionning a witness.

'Overruled. Now answer the question. We could all use a good laugh.'

"When I'm with you, Miss Lawson, the billable hours just fly by."

Shall I goeth to the Prom. Hey nonny nonny...'

Hanging Judge

Barristers playing children's games during the long vacation

Man Gardening Love

"There really is no need for confusion about the change in the enforcement of this law. Part 95 of section 33 of article Q in the manual quite clearly states ..."

'My dog ate my opinion.'

"erm...rethink..Adam and Eric doesn't seem to work..."

'Your wife got the house and the puppies.. but I managed to get you all the buried bones.'

"You've been subpoenaed to appear before the Hun's ethics committee."

'I knew it was easy, but I didn't realize it was ILLEGAL to take candy from a baby.'

May I give each of the jury a small gift?.

'Did anyone ever tell you that you're beautiful when you're litigious?'

It was a bum rap.