Pun-loving Judge Gifts

Hanging Judge

'Court's in recess!'

Do it yourself books.

"I see you also took the road less travelled!"

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

"Impartiality becomes you."

Antonin Scalia

"In view of the new evidence, my client would like to change his plea to 'guilty-ish', M'Lud."

Judge

'Disqualified!... He did not yell 'Boing' when he jumped!'

"You're a gifted writer, although at times you're just too precious."

"The defendant is a danger to society and poses a flight risk."

'...And zap him quick, before that bleeding-heart Governor gets back from vacation.'

"And what's more, you have a complete disrespect for the law."

Dreary counsel sending the judge and jury to sleep

"O.K., O.K., house arrest."

"We all make mistakes, as Your Honor knows, having been twice reprimanded by the New York State Commission on Juridical Conduct."

Man in the stocks on his typewriter.

'The defendant and the witnesses were bad enough, but then the JURY got hostile.'

'We find the defendant guilty, the defense a showboater and the DA a legal mal-practitioner.'

Computer questionning a witness.

'Overruled. Now answer the question. We could all use a good laugh.'

'Oh, boy!'

'Case dismissed! -- I just reached retirement age!'

'...Plus thirty days for not turning off your damn cell phone!'

'Orders in the court'

The US Supreme Court displays its rulings out front.

'I'm going to lay a guilt trip on you, man.'

'We find him guilty... but hey... we could be wrong!'

Bank manager standing in front of safe has combination written on his hand

Court of Appeals maintains suspension of immigration restrictions

Hamster Cello tape.

'Look, it has to be 'guilty' or 'not guilty' - you can't plead 'I don't want to talk about it.'!'

Manspreading scandal at the supreme court.

"The only person who is going to be able to make any sense of this trial is the sketch artist."