Pun-loving Prosecutor Gifts

'...And zap him quick, before that bleeding-heart Governor gets back from vacation.'

"I keep feeling we should float the company"

Do it yourself books.

"After I graduate middle school, high school and college, I'll go to law school to get you out of this. But I want my retainer now."

"Sklar, Liebowitz, Rubin and Kaminsky... Attorneys a go-go."

"I didn't say I started jogging, I said blogging."

"The defendant is a danger to society and poses a flight risk."

'I wanted to go straight. . . but then I learned a law degree.'

Man in the stocks on his typewriter.

'I just had to come over...You caught my eye.'

Computer questionning a witness.

'Overruled. Now answer the question. We could all use a good laugh.'

'You precisely said 'straight over at the roundabout'. You didn't say anything about going around it.'

Hanging Judge

Cat punishement.

'At least it's a dry heat'

Barristers playing children's games during the long vacation

'Guess where these low cost shotgun shells were made!!'

'Phht! This activist judge wont throw the book at him. He just tosses it underhand.'

'I learned a new word today!'

'You want to see a lawyer? No problem — he's a lawyer.'

Bank manager standing in front of safe has combination written on his hand

'Dumpty vs. All the kings men...'

'I like it!'

'If you commit a crime when you're slow as molasses & leave a trail of slime you're going to do some time.'

Hamster Cello tape.

'Dude! You got the needle! Freakin' A that's cool, those things are wickedly hard to find!'

What are you doing? I'm letting double glazing chat to free holidays.

'You seem certain he'll win the second race. Yes, because he's in the first race.'

'Property: We do flats' 'tyres: We do flats'