Sofa Strategist Gifts

"Technically I have managed to get that big old sofa out the door..."

'Of course there's a solution - buy a three seater settee.'

I'd say you've got assertivity issues

'When we got married, I said I'd move mountains for you...I never said anything about a sofa!'

"Not sure what to watch? Go to menu/settings/power/off/pick up a book."

'Darling...I'm afraid the sofa salesmen got the better of me.'

Flexible working

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

"First time visitors should always check the seating chart before entering the sanctuary."

"The couch hates me Jane!"

"I can't decide whether to get upset and wake him up... or wait and see if it works!"

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

The sofa freshly made up...

I don't trust banks. I keep some of my money right here. It's prudent to have a financial cushion.

My comfort zone

'Sure it looks bad now, but try to imagine it with the right shoes.'

"Somebody has screwed-up the seating arrangements" - Seating is an optical illusion.

"Of course we don't mind you working from home - we'd just rather it was from your own home, Mr Webb."

Wearing all black

"The Procrastination World Championships were only a month away. He never trained so hard."

'Oh, yes, you will get off!'

'Ed's always been a bit of a dreamer.'

'Not watching this,are you luv?'

'He's part Great Dane and part couch potato.'

'We added on to the couch.'

"I see we're all going into this interview a little superstitious."

Chillaxing!

"She died doing what she loved."

"I was thinking we might staycation on the sofa."

'We've found it Chandler- The forbidden temple!'

"Damn! Trust me to get a seat behind the umpire!"

Plein Air Painting: Quarantine Edition