Soccer Sideline Strategist Pillows

'If I could pick as many winners as he picks balls out of net - I'd be a rich man.'

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

Perils of the double play.

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

The Other Cooperstown

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

"I love fast break business success."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

'I've never seen so many strikers in one team before.'

"It evened out, for every free kick they got, we had one against us."

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

"Look, I know the other team is taller than we are...but I'm pretty sure this isn't allowed."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'