Stadium Strategist Pillows

Football Pitch Line Markings.

No More Waiting Around

'Structural strength test? Next door!'

'For our valiant athletes, this will be the open concept suite.'

'My stopwatch says Bubba just ran a 4.3 40. I think that's a runtime error.'

"When we're done building the arena, do you think we'll get free tickets?"

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Perils of the double play.

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

The Other Cooperstown

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'I hate bloody football! It's just a bunch of over-rated, overpaid nancy boys kicking a b-' - 'Genuine football fans may leave work early to avoid missing the start of important World Cup fixtures.' - 'C'mon England!'

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"I love fast break business success."

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

"We tried to play nicely, but frankly it's not as much fun as tormenting each other."

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

Baseball Clubhouse Pranks