Soccer Joker Gifts

The defence were confident about their offside trap.

Footballer changes shirt with the ref.

Banana Split...

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

". . . So that's 4 birdies, 1 eagle, 2 ferrets and a rabbit!"

Get crazy once in a while

'Hole in one!!!!'

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'They're being damn noisy in the hospitality box next door,'

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

Jogging Bottoms

Golfer wears 'How's my driving?' t-shirt.

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

'Robert.....Why do you think they call slanted letters italics.'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

'And remember...no sudden moves in the shoot out.'

Toilet humour

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

Here lies BoBo the Clown

No infrastructure problem here

Ref shows footballer green card.

Mr. Bubbles was beginning to regret sending his son off to clown college. 'Is that what they teach you, up at that fancy school of yours?!'

"Everybody's a comedian. When I asked the clerk if he had this size bolt, he laughed and asked, 'What are you - some kind of nut?'"

False encouragement.

"Now go home and forget about your amnesia..."