Snow Philosopher Gifts

'All this is nuthin! There was one yeaw up noth...when it snowed fah two yeaws! I had t'dig down ten feet t'haul in my lobstah traps.'

Lemniskate

"Bless You."

'I know I'm still in the Juniors, but I already need a therapist.'

Rude Snowpeople

Creativity

'I'm afraid I'll fall and no one will hear me.'

'Dear, could you hold it down to a light snow flurry?'

Deer against capital punishment about to be shot.

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

"Pssst .. kid! What's the latest on global warming?"

'It's almost time to get the cross-country skis out and dust them off.'

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

"Why can't they call it a 'Deer' or a 'Squirrel' market?"

"I'm sorry your girlfriend left you, Frank...but you must concentrate on the job!"

'Buddy, I'll get stinking rich... yesterday, I took out an insurance against pneumonia!'

I Love Winter!

'I'd give anything to be able to sit down.'

"Here, but you'd better hurry and drink it before it gets warm."

"Take it easy! Thinking snow doesn't mean necessarily mean wanting snow!"

'Nothing against you, Dad, but I'd rather be a POLITICAL pundit.'

You B*****D

'I'm not up here seeking wisdom - this is the only place they'll let me smoke.'

"Respect every snowflake as you clear my driveway."

'I just hiked over a mile with that bear while debating the use of nuclear energy. I told you these animals are used to people.'

'Just sayin' it was a lot more relaxing around here before they invented ‘the Cloud.''

"What about you? Would you rather leave a stump or be mulched and scattered?"

'So, you see... Global warming is why it snows!'

"It needs a bit of work."

"Being deciduous isn't a choice - it's what I am."