Snow Philosopher Gifts

'All this is nuthin! There was one yeaw up noth...when it snowed fah two yeaws! I had t'dig down ten feet t'haul in my lobstah traps.'

Lemniskate

"Bless You."

'I know I'm still in the Juniors, but I already need a therapist.'

Rude Snowpeople

Creativity

'I'm afraid I'll fall and no one will hear me.'

Deer against capital punishment about to be shot.

'Dear, could you hold it down to a light snow flurry?'

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

"Pssst .. kid! What's the latest on global warming?"

'It's almost time to get the cross-country skis out and dust them off.'

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

"Why can't they call it a 'Deer' or a 'Squirrel' market?"

"I'm sorry your girlfriend left you, Frank...but you must concentrate on the job!"

"Just look at Miss High and Almighty, standing there with her nose up in the air."

I Love Winter!

'Buddy, I'll get stinking rich... yesterday, I took out an insurance against pneumonia!'

'I'd give anything to be able to sit down.'

'I suppose you're entitled to your opinion, but I still say that Shemp was the greatest of them all,'

'I'm not up here seeking wisdom - this is the only place they'll let me smoke.'

'Nothing against you, Dad, but I'd rather be a POLITICAL pundit.'

"Respect every snowflake as you clear my driveway."

'I just hiked over a mile with that bear while debating the use of nuclear energy. I told you these animals are used to people.'

You B*****D

"Here, but you'd better hurry and drink it before it gets warm."

Eskimo love songs: 'But I only have ice for you...'

Preschool. Sure, my dad taught me how to write my name … but I can only show you if we go out in the snow.

"Take it easy! Thinking snow doesn't mean necessarily mean wanting snow!"

'Just sayin' it was a lot more relaxing around here before they invented ‘the Cloud.''

"What about you? Would you rather leave a stump or be mulched and scattered?"

In the days before Inkblots

'So, you see... Global warming is why it snows!'

"It needs a bit of work."

"Being deciduous isn't a choice - it's what I am."