Snail Watching T-Shirts

Snail with lots of shells says: 'I've extended as far as possible, so there was nowhere to go but down.'

"Shhhh!....Don't fire you'll stampede them."

Repossessions

"Looks like on of those 'Staycationers' in his motor home."

"The one's an en suite and the other's a walk-in wardrobe."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

Wordplay: Gastropod.

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

Local food for local consumption

"Trust me. Don't do it."

Snail Racing

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

"Ever get the feeling you're being watched?"

Slug Bait- snails love it

"I've invested in property..."

'Do you mind!!?'

Fishing Boat Derby

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

"Dude. You seem tense."

Watching Sea Life.

Cartoon showing a group snails, one has a large shell underneath him. Another snail, observing, says to his mate: "Another basement conversion.".

'Thar she blows!'

Snail Man

"He's a keeper!"

Snails on road - road works 'slow' sign.

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

Snail Pattern Balding.

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

'Try one - they're crunchy on the outside with a chewy centre.'

'You can laugh all you want, but since I bought this 'GPS' system, I haven't beached myself once!'

'Cap'n Ahab, Sir! Starbuck wants to know if you fancy a coffee.'