Snail Pace Observers T-Shirts

'This is no time for a snail's pace.'

The Zoo.

Wordplay: Gastropod.

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

Snail Racing

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

Local food for local consumption

Slug Bait- snails love it

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

'Do you mind!!?'

"Dude. You seem tense."

"I'm a monster."

Cartoon showing a group snails, one has a large shell underneath him. Another snail, observing, says to his mate: "Another basement conversion.".

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

Ewww

Snail Man

Snail Pattern Balding.

"Of course I have a little weekend shell in the country..."

Snails on road - road works 'slow' sign.

'Try one - they're crunchy on the outside with a chewy centre.'

Snail Coach

'That's one of those May-December love affairs. He's 251 years old, and she can't be a day over 135!'

"You're right, I can totally see my lung."

"How can you cross the road so decisively? I have to stop halfway across every time to rethink it."

Snail: 'Do you mean to tell me I'm not a credible author?!'

'Stress'

"Oh that, that's my holiday home."

Congratulations! When are you due?

Snail Mail

'You're gonna love it son! We'll leave our homes for a few days and live in the great outdoors'

'I'm sorry, but just don't think I can handle a long distance relationship right now.'

"In your own time, Brian, in your own time."