Smoking Satire Buff Gifts

'Hell - employees entrance.'

"My new year resolutions were to continue eating, drinking, smoking and gambling...and I've stuck to all of them!"

"Yeah, he's cute but don't approach him. He's a service human."

"I have no thumbs."

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

"And then on ab day they roll on their backs, flail, and mimic us in the throes of death."

Pope tarts.

Los Angeles' New Smart Meters

"How do you spell, asteroid?"

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

"No, it's not codependency. The neediness is just in one direction."

PSYCHIATRIC CLINIC, 'You know what I dread? -- March madness!'

Nice park. . .

'Opponents of democracy, such as Chavez and Putin, want unlimited executive power and limits on the media.'

"Clark Gable, Gary Cooper, Cary Grant -- they're all gone. But Marcus is still here."

'our chances seemed pretty good until you lighted that 20.'

"... And who asked for your opinion, I'd like to know?!"

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

"You always knew where you stood with him."

Mannequin protest

'Which dog is named 'BOGART'?'

Gigolo Diary

"More ashtray, nurse! For God's sake, more ashtray!"

'So, I am all for Juncker!'

"I only allow myself one after a meal - I'm now down to 43 meals a day!"

'Let's play some cards, boys. Oh, and by the way, the wife said if we figure out how to light these cigars we can smoke in the bowl.'

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

'Well actually, the only reason I put my head out of the window is that Master smokes while driving...'

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

The institute.

E.U. Health Farm

"That's why you don't smoke near the dang cannon!"

Beautiful lake front property/Disgusting lake rear property

'We want to give him the best possible life before we slaughter him.'