Smock Stylist Gifts

Great British Eccentrics.

Ski lift mobile

'Excuse me Ma'am, do you mind if I smoke?'

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

"Who should we have at eye level this month?"

'Eee,love - this place gives me a great idea for the spare bedroom!'

Support Group for high heels abandoned during the pandemic

The sofa freshly made up...

Ski kicker.

It took awhile for fred and his new dentures to accept each other.

Cat walking dog.

Major Poets, Minor Poets, Free Agents.

'I love your new flat screen saloon.'

Boxer's Hair Styles.

"Relax, Billy, they're just braces, even I had them when I was your age."

"I had to get braces."

"Darling! - did you know your books are crooked...?"

'Excuse me. Could you point me towards the books that would look impressive on my bookshelf?'

Library Waiting to Happen

"Please yourself, I'll add salt if you like but I'm only dyeing a pair of socks..."

'Put together beautifully. . . all you need now is some books.'

'Your teeth are straight, it's you head that's crooked.'

"I never know whether I should get good goggles I'll lose after three runs, or cheap ones I can't see out of after five runs."

Knickers, little peaked caps, gaily striped socks - it's all so chic!

"It's the modern dentist's name for x-rays."

'What do you call a blonde doing hand stands? A brunette.'

Dogs as bookends.

Eleven/Millie Bobby Brown with face mask

I did it my way.

'If velcro is good enough fro grandma and grandpa, why do I have to learn to tie my laces?'

When you mentioned a t-shaped bracket...

'Have you seen pictures of those redwood trees with holes big enough for cars to drive through?'