Slow Walkers Club Gifts

I've been fired from the Marching Band: I couldn't keep up...

"I want to make it before I hit thirty."

"I wish he'd slow the hell down." "I wish he'd hurry the hell up."

The What's-The-Hurry? Institute

'I need to get a bigger place.'

'I guess we both enjoy long slow walks together.'

"What do you mean you want to slow things down?"

Rex is suddenly regretting having offered to help the old lady cross the road...

"Don't tell the boss, but I'm leaving early to beat the traffic."

"Anyone home?"

Granny takes a turtle for a walk.

"I tried hurrying once, but it didn't get me anywhere."

Well, for me it's either a one-minute ride on the bus or a two-hour walk...

Gastropod Wedding Showers,

Actions speak louder than words. Please move slowly.

'Better slow it down a bit.'

"I shouldn't have gone to freshen up at the interval: The second act was almost over by the time I reached my seat again..."

I'd join you, but this dratted self-timer only waits for ten seconds!

'On your mark...'

"Easy does it, Ralph."

They're using our @#$% slipstream again.

Ok, ok, if that's what you need to meet your daily goal, we can do 21 paces instead.

"I hear furlough's being extended."

"It's great to be a part of an online community that shares your interests!"

In 'n out lung transplant.

"They look pretty angry Bob! We should consider letting them play through..."

Speedwalking "This makes all those funny looks I've gotten over the years seem worth it!"

Let's face it, it just wasn't for us

"Can you bring me some booze and fags Noah?"

Oh, shit. Stuck behind a dog walker.