Slow-pace Supporters Gifts

I'd join you, but this dratted self-timer only waits for ten seconds!

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

Sloth traffic jam.

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

Pension in race with tortoise and snail.

'I think I'm just coming up to the finishing line, Dear.'

'Of course business is slow. Would we want it any other way?'

Speed Checked By Radar.

Granny takes a turtle for a walk.

"Anyone home?"

"One day junior, all this will be yours..."

Boris Bike

Turtles and snails boarding Noah's Ark.

"Come on! It's the final lap!"

A tortoise

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, lady, can't you read?"

Sign outside tortoise shell: 'Out to lunch'.

"Mr. Green and I should be there in about 2 hours!"

"I've always worked from home."

"Wait, I think I got a signal!"

Well, for me it's either a one-minute ride on the bus or a two-hour walk...

"I was involved in an awful accident, and was in a coma for three weeks. Half my life flashed before me!"

"Time travel will never happen. You'd have to be able to travel faster than the speed of a tortoise for it to be possible."

Tortoise: I've been fired from the Marching Band: I couldn't keep up...

'Better slow it down a bit.'

"It's those creative types you ought to be checking on."

'On your mark...'

"Easy does it, Ralph."

"I shouldn't have gone to freshen up at the interval: The second act was almost over by the time I reached my seat again..."

I wasn't screening my calls! I just can't make it to the phone before the machine picks up!

"Sorry to pull you over, but do you realize how fast you weren't going?"

'Sorry, I don't brake for small animals.'

Library Returns

"That's made with absolutely no preservatives, so I'd eat it in the next three hours."