Slow-paced Gamer Lover Gifts

"We suck at this."

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

"Sorry, but your life moves so slowly that the ball keeps timing out."

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

'I can't believe you only lasted 3 days, 9 hours and 56 minutes.'

"It sucks being reincarnated as a snail, but at least I've finally achieved home ownership."

Tortoise Goes For A Swim

"Hang on -- I'm going to make the jump to 90 m.p.h."

"One day junior, all this will be yours..."

Granny takes a turtle for a walk.

Quiet night? Liven up that game of solitaire with a Mexican wave.

'Sorry, Bill's out of his office today, he should be back Monday.'

"Your wife wants to know why you're not home, yet."

"Giddyup!. . . Damn. I think I just wasted 500 bucks."

It's The Highway For People Who Hate To Drive

"Arlen keeps bragging about running 26 miles. What he fails to tell people is that it took him eight months to do it."

'Virtual golf, save pounds'.

"I've always worked from home."

Tortoise Mailman.

"Fishing and doing nothing are not incompatible."

Slowsave.

"That's for anyone who can't stand the sight of blood."

'...and that concludes this five-hour seminar on 'slow life'.'

'Better slow it down a bit.'

"When life gets too hectic, I just like to stop, smell the roses, and write checks."

'I love my job, but the commute is killing me.'

'You didn't GIVE me your hand in marriage! I WON IT!'

'On your mark...'

"Well yes, we've been married for eighty years, but your grandma didn't want to rush things: We were engaged for thirty years before that..."

"Are you watching these soccer games?"

Tortoise and his Little Chemist Set